Jane-Louise

10:10 pm: BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!
Enjoy! this is far by the best find yet on YouTube!

10:45 am: I ... really ... don't ... belive ... my ... eyes!!! ...Precious!
I am, for want of words, totally speechless at this little gem!

05:41 pm: Re-live the 80's
Enjoy!

04:17 pm: Iniquitous ... good word, innit?!
Well, after nearly two weeks of waiting and wondering what the hell is going on with my job and the restaurant, I have finally written my letter of resignation. You know what?! It feels good. I hope that's the end of it, I really do. Also written to their head office and policy employment team. *sigh*.

To but quote E.L.O. "Remember the good old 1980's, when life was so uncomplicated!?"

Better go and get some housework done while the kids are out watching The Simpsons Movie with a couple of their school-buddies. Almost glad I'm out and working tonight as they are going to be so hyped up on popcorn, cola and various other processed shite.

Printer's nearly spat out the letter. Seems kinda final. Won't be sorry to see the back of the place though -even though I haven't been there for nearly three weeks! LOL!"

04:42 pm: Guilfest 2007
Yes, I was there. Okay, so there were a few good laughs in the Comedy Tent, there were many more from random dudes doing random things under the influence of random stuff!



'Nuff said!

01:28 pm: This is genius!
Just because ...


Heh!

12:19 am: Imminent Birth Warning ...
Could be wrong, not experienced female cats before, but our latest animal resident (well, not quite the latest as the three hens -don't ask arrived after her) is up the duff. Got at. Bulbous. PREGNANT!

Darth Vader (no, I didn't name her) aka our little black and white cat is expecting.

Said I wouldn't have another cat but got suckered into this one like the soft-shite I am. Yes, another rescue bid ... like the chickens. Not just one cat ... oh no! ... someone has but the multiplying curse on this little lady. Probability of seven for the price of one.

This place is a zoo!

And courtesy of a picture of a 'young Dumbledore' barely clad, I don't think I'm going to get much sleep now either!!! Yes, Corgi, you know you're to blame. Bless you babes!

07:46 pm: Excuses ... or just life ...
Finished reading THE BOOK and now feel I can open the computer and not see something like "Oh no, Sirius is dead!" in some wanker's MSN chat-line. Once bitten, huh?! Suffice to say, most of my theories were proven blast-end skrewt shite, although one held true! Those of you who know me will know what I mean and those who don't ... well ... won't! Don't lose sleep over it, I am not going to.

I have been glad of the book as a distraction from reality. How wonderful to immerse myself again and forget the worse three months of my life albeit for a small while. But, where do I start? Do I start by making apologies for not being around? No ... no apologies there. I am sure the world has managed to function both before my advent onto the net and will continue to do so in my oft frequent absences.

Nigel comprehensively fell off the wagon about three months back. The lying, vindictiveness, sneakiness and anger all came back. It has worn me down acting as the Protego! charm between him and the kids. It all came to a head last week when he accused me of sleeping around. It culminated with him walking out and leaving me to cope with two distraught children. However, a cold, sobering night on a park bench gave him the opportunity to think. The time before it was me who pulled him through it, me who forced him to seek help. This time he has admitted it and is waiting for an appointment with some specialist councillers. I made the mistake before of just dealing with the visible problem. I have learned a lot in the last week that it goes deeper. The root of it was back in Northern Ireland when he saw his best friend blown apart by a landmine that clean-up ops had missed. As in many cases that the press point out, support for 'the boys' was sorely lacking and he received no councilling. Hubby is suffering PTSD and has used the drink to dull it. Now we have gotten to the root of it all, now maybe a time of healing once and for all. I refuse to give up on him as when he's not poisoned by the drink, he's really the best.

Also, going back about two months ago I managed to attain the dubious pleasure of being crowned acting head-chef at my place of work due to the mass exodus of the dudes that couldn't cope with Debs (a temporary kitchen manager thrown at us by head office to try to sort out the place). Trouble was, the people in situ at the time were so set in their ways that when Debs showed them the proper way they took umbridge and resigned. I doggedly stuck it out, learned from her and was, in due time, given said position. Debs left and, whaddya know, the guys came crawling back. One of them got the position of head-chef back, no great shakes there ... I like the guy and was only holding the position on a temp basis anyway. Imagine my indignation when he came back and awarded sous chef positions to his brother and one of the boys I had trained! I resigned and started another job a week later. I had been there for a week when one of the other new starters in the kitchen got nasty with me. I retalliated verbally, but not after a good twenty minutes of calm reasoning that I didn't like the tone of his voice. Consequently I am on paid probabation with a view to getting sacked! Turns out that he burst into tears in front of management and slagged me down even though he had started it. I had a board review with two of the managers a fortnight ago where they took my side of the story. I learned, much to my amusement (and I admit I did laugh until tears rolled down my face) that I had threatened to kill said cry-baby. At which I retorted that if I had got in first, wailed and stamped my feet at the management before he did, I suppose the outcome of this 'trial' would be much different.

It goes on and on. So, out of work and treading carefully round my own house ... summary of my last three months. On top of that, the stress has brought back some medical curiosities that I thought I had totally shaken. Working on that one at the moment. Stress, that wondeful state of awareness that just keeps on giving and giving.

So, basically, that lot sums up my absence and my unwillingness to put down thoughts lest I lay myself totally bare. Too much happenning inside my head. However, right now I think that there's a little break in the figurative clouds and the sunrise is just starting to poke through. I feel that I might come out of it stronger.

And the next line is probably what inspired me, okay, altered a bit, but it helped my twisted little existance to unravel a bit.

It is it my head, or is it real? Hmmm ... who's to say what is in my head isn't real!

I'll just potter off now, shall I?!

07:03 pm: Just testing. New computer. Hoping that this works! Thanks for your patience, y'all!

05:52 pm: Feeling better ...
Been away sicky for a while, oh and working all hours too.

To start with the sickness. Finally I have gotten my heavy arse down to 9 stone in weight. However, not exactly the way I wanted to. My hubby bought some cakes cheap that were just on the sell-by date. He ate three and just gave himself stinky wind ... anyone who knows my hubby - nothing new there! I ate one and within half an hour I wasn't feeling too great. Within three I didn't think I was going to live. Who says that eating chocolate cake puts weight on?! I would TOTALLY disagree there.

Consequently I have been laid up for a few days with immense stomach pains and the urge to make calls to Ruth and Huey down the porcelain telephone. Not great ... three sets of paperwork for sick-leave to three jobs. I DETEST paperwork at the best of times and merely tolerate it when the needs must.

The bright point of it all was time off work.

And now I'm going to call in a favour of you all. Can you check out this link? I've entered a photographic competition and need a few more ratings to get me on the leaderboard where I might even stand a chance. Alternatively, it will give you a good look, if nothing else, at some of the other photographs taken of the Surrey area. Go check out my beautiful county. Quite frankly, I'm not overly worried if you vote or not, just rather proud of the pretty place that I am lucky enough to live in. Do enjoy.

http://www.itsmymarket.com/photos/view.php?photocomp=15&photo=11144&mode=&user=0&start=120&tags=&sort=date&dir=desc

And now ... I'm off to make a few more calls in the small office!!!!111one!

02:26 pm: Wahoo!
Well, well, well!

Seems that my husband knows people in the know ... know what I mean! LOL!

One of his night shift work mates actually MAKES custom built computers. So I'm getting one. One with a spec that would cost me upwards of a grand in the shops but I'm getting it for the price that he makes it seeing as Nigel is a mate. £250 sound good? Bloody well did to me. Could be that I will have the chats up and running again within four weeks time. Oh I'm sooooo pleased.

Been busy for the last few days what with work, parent's evenings and knitting a scarf for the stage school mascot that Jake has brought home ... again! Also knitting woolly hats (there's a story behind that) and I intend to have over 100 of them by Christmas this year, hopefully a few sets of gloves too. One way of getting rid of all the otherwise useless bits of wool that have been cluttering up the place.

I've tidied up the upstairs 'office' too. Had a bit of a furniture move around to accommodate second computer as I'm not getting rid of this one. I intend to have it as a stand alone to run my memory-hogging programmes such as Photoshop and suchlike. The kids can use it for their computer disc games and education packages and I won't have to worry about them figuring out how to get onto the net and find strange and nasty stuff.

So, summary: All is good in my world at present! Hope your one is just as blessed.

Happy Lent ... give up being miserable ... take up loving your neighbour! Lets hear a big 'AMEN' to that one.

10:24 pm: My kids had a lucky day ...
Lucky in that they are still breathing, walking and not displaying broken bones!

Jake has discovered the fine art and subtle science of sarcasm, punctuated with stony silences, incomprehensible grunts and THE DARK LOOK. Can't imagine where the little shite got that lot from but his sister is fair and fast picking up on it. Mort and Aurora have come home to roost and Else is questioning their dubious parentage. Even my snake (Monty, the big-un) seems to be in a constant snit with me. Well, sorry mate ... I know you like gerbils, but they're off the menu. A frozen gerbil, although they may taste better, are three times the price of a fat mouse or ratling.

I digress ... back to Jake and Eleanor. I decided that the long walk to school would be informative and it took the shape of a long discussion (ie, YOU listen while Mum rants and tries to pry a reason out of the pair of you why you are acting like this). A mile or so in the frozen, icy snow that was still hanging around and I thought I had made headway. Moment we get through the school gates I ask the pair of them to do something and they ignore me no less than three times. Cue Eluned Hughes (scary Welsh Headmistress) coming round corner. She hollers at my two kids, makes me feel like an inedequate mum in the meantime. My pair copped a cuffing off me and got unceremoniously marched into the breakfast club and sat in corners to read their books (my punishment not Headmistress'. No one makes a monkey out of me, especially unruly kids ... ESPECIALLY MINE! They were rather cowed and well behaved when we met up again this evening. All is well. I wonder how long it will last.

But it didn't stop there.

Left the kids in the club and donned my crossing patrol get-up, complete with big sign saying STOP. Generally what would you do if I held that up at the side of the road?

Correct! A point to all those who would stop. It's actually the law. Those who gave any other answer, don't even contemplate driving down my road or you'll ... well, just don't and I'll leave it at that.

Seven cars, over the period of 40 minutes, decided that they had better things to do that stop for a Lollypop lady this morning. I'm usually pretty cool and efficient but five to nine this morning I was seen to throw my sign after one of them and shout: "Does this look like a bleedin' umbrella to you?!?" Followed by "And YOU can get off that damn mobile phone while you're driving" to some unfortunate who just happenned to be in the wrong place doing the wrong thing at the moment. A couple of the mums stood slack jawed whilst the kids watched on in awe as Mrs Bassett finally blew her stack. It doesn't often happen but when it does, I am assured that it's quite entertaining.

At least it's half term next week. I need the break.

06:11 pm: Potter Potter Potter Potter Potter Potter ...
In view of the Potter-mania that is starting to resurface (and in fact in most of my friends-list, never went underground!!) I have only one thing to post:

http://thefifthdistrict.com/potter/

It's high time this was resurrected and enjoyed!

08:39 pm: Men ... Factual, Fictional and Fantasy!
Don't blame me for this one, blame ... hell YOU know I'm talking about YOU J.C.!!!

A glass of wine, a trawl down LJ posts and replying to various stuff got me wondering just what a certain person *cough*JC*cough* sees in Star Trek's Data android dude. Then I went all random and figured out my taste isn't all that normal either. So girls, and boys 'cos I know there are a few of you out there, let's hear your top five fantasy men figures (or women for the blokes if you're that way inclined) and WHY! Suppose I had better start the ball rolling. One rule ... you can't say spouse. That goes without saying that they will be top of your list.

5. Who Odo from Star Trek Why Let's face it, he can look like who and what he wants and what woman wouldn't refuse a guy who can change his size and shape at will!

4. Who Data, also from Star Trek Why A man of logic, nice working parts that can be upgraded at a pinch, good conversation on any subject and hasn't got lost round the universe yet (and would admit it if he did unlike the human models).

3. Who Alice Cooper Why Long, dark hair. Brooding eyes. Better dresser than me (but only just). Great lyrics and a wonderful (?!) voice. Likes big snakes ... just like me.

2. Who Robbie Rotten from Lazytown Why Because I'm weird and he's weird. He has an amazing array of disguises, some involving dresses - 90% of them involving stripey lycra. He tries to be evil but doesn't quite manage. Silly grin, great eyes, tight buns. All is well in my world! *drool*

1. Who Prof. Severus Snape Why Because my RP character was practically married to him and when you casually study the psychology of the greasy lump he kind of grows on you. Other than that, dark unwashed hair, great eyes, evil, unobtainable, likes big snakes ... just like me.

Well, that was therapeutic and putting it down in writing I can see a pattern emerging. I can count several subsets and intersecting subjects. Thank you for listening, have a nice day, respond so I can analyze you too! BWAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

This random post was brought to you by the letter J and by the number 4

01:51 pm: Some Robbie-Worship
No, NOT Robbie Williams...

... Robbie Rotten.

Yes, yes. New bloke in my life. Not quite up there with Snape just yet, but probably cruising a close second. Well, gotta have a hobby I guess. It all started out when the kids had an inset day from school. For those accross the water who may not be familiar with the phrase: Inset day = day off school for teachers to do stuff they could well have done on the last day of the holiday but would rather leave it for the first day of term. They are a pain in the arse, especially when you have to work and get cover for kids that would otherwise have been ensconced in the fine arts of learning.

But I digress ...

Kids were at home, watching box when this wonderful, colourful, rather interesting program came on. Full of healthy living, fruit, good morals, nice twee messages and MEN IN TIGHT LYCRA jumping around all over the place. Oh, did I mention a girl with pink hair? The Potter lot will appreciate what I saw there!!! OOOOPSIE!!! I have a similar wig, but that's a different story altogether. So, going back to the programme - I was hooked. You lot should really Google up and have a look at LAZYTOWN. It's legendary. There's a lass on the net who does little films of clips of it to music. Check her out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mK3TFm70lZU&mode=related&search=

Also, got this from somewhere or other. It's an endless source of amusement to me. Dunno who passed it on, can't remember but thanks whoever. (Below)

03:02 pm: Well, it seems like the computer is lasting! Have downloaded a few things such as Adobe. MSN chat and Yahoo chat still not wanting to play ball. Absolutely no dice there. Funds are starting to pick up so the possibility of a new computer at some point this year is looking like quite a real possibility. Yay! Just got to get the rest of my digital camera paid off. Maybe I should start selling photographs to the newspapers, exclusive pics and all that. Only trouble is that to do that and be first on the scene I'd have to listen into the police band radio. And we all know that it's not an offense to listen in but it IS an offence to act on information heard. Oh well ... will just have to continue earning money the hard way running between my three jobs.

Things are getting increasingly difficult as far as spare time goes - hence the time between sorting out computer / posting / just general park-arse time. I really miss the days when my work allowed me to be on the net for a couple of hours at a time at least! I'm feeling so totally out of touch. I miss all the 'Potter' crew and it breaks me that although I have the inclination to really get with it, time is somewhat prohibitive. Even now I'm looking at the time and thinking that I'm going to have to get my chef whites sorted and be out of the house in fifteen minutes. *sigh*

Kids are growing fast and making more and more demands on my time. Love them dearly though. It's all too easy in this age of convenience to hand them over the the Playstation and Television for one-the-spot babysitting. I notice around me that a lot of parents are taking this easy option. Granted, my two have these priviledges but that is what they are PRIVILEDGES and not rights. We still believe in feeding the ducks, getting muddy and quality time. My entire one day off, Saturday, is totally eaten up with quality time and running the pair of them to StageCoach stage school (Jake) and Explore Learning (Eleanor) before the regulation visit to Nanny and Gramps Alborough. Oh yeah, time to blow Jake's trumpet. He finally appeared on Trial and Retribution on the TV. Last 15 seconds of a two parter called The Sins of The Fathers. Excellent program. Jake was the little kid in the flashback waving from the window. Dear little bugger totally stole the show. Yeah ... biased mummy. So sue me dudes!

On subjects of Potter: Went into Waterstones (which seems to have mysteriously replaced Ottakars since last book) and slapped down my deposit for book 7. That will mean another night of queueing up to get my book at a minute past midnight. Think that I will take Jake and Eleanor this time. I doubt they will seen an event like this in their lifetime. In view of Snape's rather shocking departure I am wondering if I should go dressed up this time. Hell yeah, why not! The hair's growing back to it's entropic steady state as I've deemed hair-styles an unneccesary and expensive evil and the hair dye has made a reappearance as I was starting to grow a white stripe in my fringe again.

What else? Too much shite to mention.

Random crap: Held a chameleon at the pet store yesterday. Cool little buggers. I think I want one. Also saw a scorpion. Jake was impressed.

Books read so far this January and what I think of them.

Stephen King, CELL: ***** rating on that one. Good, unexpected ending.
James Patterson, 5th HORSEMAN: ***** women's murder club never fails to amaze. Nice twist with a few misleading paths.
Tove Jansson, FINN FAMILY MOOMINTROL: **** kids book, read to kids over period of a week. Loved it as a kid, love it now. Seriously, adults out there ... go read!

Crap! Out of time. Need to go to work. Nice being back.

Tags: books, computer, return

11:12 pm: Oh Wow!
Have you ever had one of those moments in your life that you will remember for the rest of it? I had one tonight. The lead up to it was working late cheffing at the restaurant I work at. Finished late, no lights on my pushbike, and decided to go home down the canal / river path which was the quickest route. Nearly rode into the water twice and into the nettles at least a dozen times, but just as I was approaching the end of the path ... I saw them ... loads of little spots of green, glowing lights in the grass.

... so ...

Tomorrow night, after dark, I am taking my children to see something I have never seen before in all my 36 years on this planet ...

GLOW WORMS!

02:59 pm: Long time no input.
I'm hopefully back online. Much has happenned over the last couple of months ... being without a computer has been one of them. It's felt like losing a limb ... all my communication with friends over the internet forcibly taken from me ... not to mention the hassles of having to get a friend to sort out unfinished eBay business. However, that lot has been the least of our worries.

Nigel lost his job due to the bungling incompetence of his security firm and the SIA (the guys who issue the security licenses). Without a license, he cannot work as security personnel. He was effectively kicked off of site when the joint effort of Securiplan and the SIA failed to grant the license he had taken an exam for and applied for back in September 2005! 20 years of working in that industry down the tubes. In the meantime, I have had to extend my hours to keep the bills paid, sometimes not even getting to see the inside of my house from seven in the morning to gone midnight at night, moving between three jobs. My health has suffered, my family life has suffered and the kids, God bless the pair of them, have muddled through unscathed. Something to be said about their resillience. Wonder who they get that from?!?

Courtesy of the lack of funds, I have not been able to replace my computer. It's taken the best part of three weeks but I have managed to repair it myself and get a shaky connection (can't promise how long it will last as I'm no expert at this kind of electronic side of things).

However, looking at this stuff I count myself blessed in that my problems are relatively minor. In the interim since when I last managed to post anything a neighbour clung tentatively to life, thankfully pulling through when it all looked rather bad and my friend (Jake's teacher) lost her 16 year old disabled son whilst on holiday abroad.

I count my blessings.

I have missed all of you guys out there in Dogstar land and LJ land. You know who you are.

02:10 pm: In the words of Ron Weasley .... BLOODY HELL!!!
I'M A GRANDMA!

My stepdaughter had a little boy, 7lb and 4oz this morning. I'm elated. The first thing I went to do after I had found out was to tell my mum and dad. Dad has been gone for six years, mum for nine. Funny how life bowls you an odd one now and then. It's a bitter-sweet moment in time for me as I've achieved what they never managed to do. Hey ... my little step-daughter, my pretty little bridesmaid, my giggling night-club companion of more than one occasion ... is now a woman and mum in her own rights. I am so proud of her.

Raise a glass, y'all: TO KIRSTY, GAVIN AND LITTLE BOY!

On a more sobering note, I nearly lost my brother in law yesterday. He had a new car and it had new carped (obviously) fitted in it. The carpet was snagged up in the acceleration cable which caused the vehicle to malfunction and continue accellerating even with the pedal not being used. Steve had a lucky escape ... and survives to become Great Uncle Steve this morning!

More sobering still: Steve's ex-wife has finally lost the plot to her alcoholism. She fell down drunk, cracked her head wide open and sustained enough brain-damage to pick up a carving knife and weild it at her own daughter. Thank heavens that Steve has custody of the girls. The ex has now been permanently assigned to a mental hospital and he had to take the girls there this morning to say goodbye. She's not expected to recover her faculties, if anything.

The Lord gives and the Lord taketh away. I truly withold that sentiment.

Must sign off now (now that the computer is fixed ... broken by my kids, incidentally) and get to work.

Love to you all and granny hugs!

01:32 pm: Remember me??
After a call last night from Corgi (thanks babes!), it actually occurred to me that I may be overdoing it with work.

Normal Tuesday, Thursday, Friday: Up at between half five and half six of a morning to get the daily stuff up and running, get the kids ready, lunchboxes sorted ... bla bla bla. Walk into school (lost the luxury of the car now that Nigel has changed jobs and is on a 12 hour shift from 0600-1800). Crossing patrol from 0825 - 0910 then walk home. Get ready for work at the restaurant from 1030-1400, cycle the three miles to the job ... then cycle straight to the afterschool club to set up. Back on crossing patrol until 1545, back into the school club and finish at 1745 normally. Walk home with two tired and griping kids, get the tea ready. Feed the kids, husband, myself. Bath the kids. Help with homework. This usually brings us up to about 2000 hours at which point, depending on if there needs to be any shopping, straight to bed.

Sometimes I get lucky enough to do a shift at the restaurant on Mondays and Wednesdays, too. Occasionally I get to work split shift and cover for someone from 1900 - 2300 in the evenings as well. Unfortunately, when stuff needs to be bought for the house, kids and so forth money is money and there are two loans to be paid off.

Saturday ... running the kids back and forth to their clubs, shopping, housework, garden. Occasional cover for the restaurant if they're up shit creak without a paddle.

Sunday ... get to lay in until about eight ayem. Managed to get to the local market for cheap veg this morning. Even managed to get in a bath that lasted a quarter of an hour. In a couple of hours I shall be going to work for an eight hour shift at the restaurant.

I've missed my computer.
I've missed my friends.
I feel totally out of touch.
I had to really think about the code I use for the green writing!!!
I need a break but can't really see an end in sight.

On the upside ...

We're slowly pulling ourselves out of debt. We're even hopeful of a holiday this year. I really hope so.

I've missed you guys.